Shall I tell you how this book started?

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It was supposed to be a little book of prayers. That’s it.

 

I had been sharing some of my own prayers online, and women were responding to them in a way that moved me.

 

They were saving them. Sharing them. Telling me they needed those words too. And I understood why.

 

The prayers I share are not prayers I write because I think I have something profound to say.

 

They are personal. They come from my own life. My own struggles. My own conversations with God.

 

I write what I need to pray. And then I share it because I know I am probably not the only woman who needs those words.

 

So I sat down with the idea of creating 21 prayers...

7 around unbecoming.

7 for the in-between.

And then 7 around becoming.

 

Simple.

 

Except...the more I began looking at the prayers, the more I realized there was a story underneath them.

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My story. And maybe, in some ways, yours too.

 

Because I know what it’s like to spend years becoming who everyone else needs you to be.

 

I know what it’s like to be so aware of everyone else’s feelings that you stop noticing your own.

 

I know what it’s like to question yourself. To seek approval. To confuse keeping the peace with actually having peace.

 

I know what it’s like to finally begin changing and then discover that change can be incredibly uncomfortable.

 

I know what it’s like:

To set the boundary and cry.

To make a decision and question it.

To disappoint someone you love.

To know you cannot go back to who you were, while still not being completely sure of who you’re becoming.

 

And I also know what it’s like to come out on the other side of some of that. Not perfectly.

 

Pa-lease!! I still have my moments. I still recognize old patterns. I still have to remind myself what I know.

 

But I also know what it’s like to now live with a peace I did not have before.

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I know what it’s like:

To trust myself.

To stop trying to prove my worth.

To love people without disappearing inside of them.

To know that someone else can be disappointed in me and I can still be okay.

To live from my worth instead of constantly working for it.

 

That is why this book became more than a collection of prayers. 

 

It became a journey through three places I know very well:

Unbecoming. That’s the place of letting go of the versions of yourself built around who you thought you had to be.

 

The In-Between. That uncomfortable space where the old way no longer fits, but the new way doesn’t feel natural yet.

 

Becoming. Not arriving. Not perfection. But learning how to live as the woman God created you to be.

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I want to say something about the prayers before you begin.

 

You don't have to pray these exactly as I wrote them. Use my words if they help. Change them if they don't. Add your own. Stop in the middle if you need to.
 

Sit quietly. Cry. Get angry. Be honest. God isn't looking for the perfect prayer. He's looking for you.

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And you don’t have to read these prayers in order either. Maybe you will. Maybe you want to begin at the first page and move through the whole book. Do that.

 

But maybe one day you will need A Prayer for When Someone Is Disappointed in Me. 

Maybe you'll need A Prayer for the Woman Tired of Catching Her Breath.

Maybe, months from now, you will find yourself slipping into an old pattern and come back to A Prayer for When I Lose My Way Again.

 

Come back. These prayers are here for you whenever you need them.

 

If there is one thing I have learned, it is that becoming is not a straight line. We can grow and still struggle. We can know better and still lose our way. We can be strong in one area and still be learning in another.

 

And none of that means the work has been wasted. It means we are human.

 

So wherever you are right now...

Unbecoming.

Somewhere in between.

Becoming.

You are welcome here.

 

Come as you are. And let’s begin.